Last night I had some vivid dreams. No, not one or two but four that I remembered when I woke up. Now I'm a firm believer that dreams are your subconscious working something out. For example, growing up and even sometimes today I have a reoccurring nightmare when I am falling down a flight of stairs. I sometimes wake with my arms and legs in the air. www.dreamdictionary.org has alot to say about this dream including "when we fall in our dreams it really means we have lost control with some sort of situation in your life. Falling in your dream is a way your unconscious communicates with your conscious to let you know that something needs to be fixed right away." This dream was most frequent when I lived with my abusive step-father.
The first was one about my dog. I woke one morning to find his legs had no fur on them and his skin was red and looked like they had chemical burns. I panicked and wanted to take him to the vet but I couldn't afford to, nor could I afford to pick up his food from the vet. I called my Mum and older sister to ask them to help me. My older sister said she would meet me at the vets office. When I arrived at I noticed the sky was this weird colour and realized that nuclear bombs had been set off that night. The strangest part of this was this dream was set in my hometown (city). I can't remember that last time I dreamt I lived there.
The second was also set in my hometown. I was going downtown on transit but I realized after I got on the bus that it wasn't a transit but but a re-purposed school bus. Before going under the underpass to downtown the bus got stuck because it was too tall.
Third, I was still dating my first serious boyfriend. I was living with him but broke up with him and was trying to back all my belongings into boxes and somehow cart them onto transit.
Lastly and the most random grouping of people, I was dating a co-worker, who I actually didn't really like when I first met him and I'm certainly not attracted to. We were living together and one day I sat him down and broke up with him. Shortly after I was packing my belongings and for some reason the front door was open. A childhood friend lived in the apartment building saw me packing and poked her head into the apartment to inquire what I was doing. I said in passing I dumped my boyfriend and was moving out (ever so casually). She told me congrats. My boyfriend (co-worker) basically gave me the wtf look and asked why I was dumping him. I said it was because , among other things, I wanted kids and he had said previously he didn't. He tried to convince me that I wouldn't find someone else to have kids with before my biological clock ran out. I moved down the street (literally down my current street) into another building. My neighbour turned out to be a former co-worker from a city I had previously lived in.
The last one I kind of get what my subconscious was trying to work out. I struggle with the fact I may not find Mr. Right before the clock runs out on having children of my own. But why the heck was I dating my co-worker? I mean, I get along with him now but I would NEVER date a guy like him.
I also understand the first one because I worry about a not being prepared for an emergency or a post-apocalyptic world. I don't own a gun despite having the safety training course required to apply for my gun permit. I didn't get one because I didn't trust myself not to turn it on myself. I'm reconsidering this now considering I no longer have those thoughts. Also, I don't have enough dried foods or water. I really should put together a bug-out-bag and get myself organized.
Anyways, if you have any insights please feel free to leave me a comment!
No comments:
Post a Comment